Today I did something productive.

Okay firstly for lunch went out with my family for combined birthday lunch for my mum and I. Cuz my father wont be in Singapore during my mum's birthday so celebrate together.

But doesnt really matter to me 'cuz on Fri night I went out with my mum and had dinner with her and walked around Junction8 and Northpoint with her, so I'm really happy for the quality time spent with my mummy(:

My mum is really the most important person in my life and I am really glad that I have put her first and never ever replaceable. Because people WILL fail us. Other than my mum, I have put others 'first' too. As in first after my mum. But so far? Everyone I have put first has disappointed me. Maybe I have disappointed them too but I am sure that I was never first in their lives.

ANYWAY!

So after lunch went home and was REALLY nua. Then my mum told me to go and pack my cupboard and weed out all the clothes I don't want since I'm so nua. I told her I dowan, ALL MY CLOTHES I STILL WANT (not true, I'm just lazy).
Then my mummy say I'm a lazyworm:(
She say I'm a lazyworm say lazy words. Haha.

But anyway after that I really went into my room and started looking through my cupboards.

And anyway I had decided awhile back that I wanted ALL my sports stuff to be in 1 cupboard so it would be easier for me to look for my sports stuff. So since my mum asked me to weed stuff out I wanted to rearrange my closet too.

So it began. And my nose is SO BLOODY SENSTIVE that till now I am having blocked nose and flu.

But it was SO PRODUCTIVE!

Weeded out SO MUCH STUFF FROM MY CLOSET such that 1 makeshift rack (actually just bamboo pole suspended between 2 bookshelves) was TOTALLY REARRANGED AND REMOVED. AMAZING!!

Ya.. for someone who doesnt shop much i seriously have tons of clothes. Don't ask me how. I don't know.

And packing my sports stuff I realised I have ALOT OF DRYFIT CLOTHES. All from my runs so I will NEVER THROW THEM AWAY. Looking through them makes me so happy. My first ever run, RealRun in 2010. Lots of Nikerun shirts and then subsequently Sundown and Straits Times Run. It's been lots of fun and it will only become more fun and more exciting!!

And I had alot of fbts and sports bras. It's like a compulsion. Everytime I go Cotton On body I cant resist. I have 4 sports bras from Cotton On and 3 exercise shorts from them. That is like after I have 7 (?) pairs of FBTS. And like alot of sports bras too.

I hate shopping for clothes but when I see sportswear my eyes light up. Ya go figure.. I don't even jog anymore. Haven't jogged since goodness knows when.


Packed through and discarded lots of old clothes and ALOT OF PANTS. Those uncool thick jeans which I used to wear. Oh goodness I was so uncool. And I'm not even cool now and I can say I was uncool.

Infact I cleared 4 bags of clothes!! Which is great 'cuz the whole reason why my mum made me pack my closet was 'cuz 8Dec there is some organisation coming to collect old clothes and etc for charity for the needy or something.

Hmm out of 4 bags about 1.5 bags were really new looking or really new (one totally new floral highwaist shorts which my sis gave me 'cuz too big for her but fit me beautifully. I took it thinking MAYBE SOMEDAY I will be girly enough to wear it. Now I know I shouldn't bother fighting it so.. away it goes!) were to be passed to my aunty to sell at the front of her shop (she does alterations) at cheap cheap prices.

And I took out ALL the sleeveless tops in my cupboard and put them together. All the rompers together!! For the first time in my life my cupboard is (slightly) organised!!

Also threw away 2 slippers and 2 pairs of shoes from the shoe cupboard in the living room.

So happy!! Like.. I feel free-er.



Sidetrack: Quarrelled again. On the phone. Turned off my phone this time so I will not continue quarrelling back and forth through Whatsapp which always happens. Cried and then went to bathe.

Nonetheless I am sure tomorrow when I turn it on again there will be messages which will make my heart sink and my blood boil.

Alittle depressing to be here sniffling away from the blocked nose+flu from dust and feeling so down.



Watched almost the whole series of Rurounin Kenshin in 2days. I LOOOOOOOVE Rurounin Kenshin!! My favouritest anime ever. The movie wasnt half as good but the Kenshin was OH SO CUTE AND HANDSOME!!!!! Super loves!

And recently keep listening to Love is Move by Secret. Like that's the only Korean song I search for in Youtube and listen to. Just like it.



Hope tomorrow will be a good day and available to swim. I need to swim. I need a tan.

I think it started quite awhile back but I never realised it till recently. Like it didnt occur to me until recently. I used to be a bathroom singer. Like when I'm bathing I'm always singing. Disney, Praise, Worship, random English songs which match my mood, parts of Chinese songs which I actually know the lyrics to, and so on. But mostly English songs/Worship/Disney.

But recently I have stopped. Not even recently. It's been a while. Have I kinda lost that little bit of childlikeness? Have I 'grown up' in the way i fear the most?

Not really sure.. but I really dont sing much in the showers anymore.



Another random is that it has been raining alot recently. Like EVERYDAY kind of alot. Which is normal, it's December after all. But it is totally fine with me because i ABSOLUTELY LOVE RAIN. It makes me calm. Sometimes when I've had a huge quarrel and am feeling really down and it starts to rain, I actually feel comforted and better. I know right, SO WEIRD when the skies are 'crying' and I feel better? But seriously rain has a very calming and hapy effect on me. I love rainy days.

And there is a word for it!! I am a PLUVIOPHILE.

Definition of Pluviophile, a lover of rain;someone who finds joy and peace of mind during rainy days.
-From collinsdictionary.com

Except... sometimes I wanna swim and when I wanna swim I want the sun to be relentless. Like 'PLEASE TRY TO BURN ME!!' type of relentless. I really love swimming when the weather is a killer. Only thing is when walking to the pool I am dripping with sweat.

But because recently it has been all thunderstorms I haven't been swimming. A little upset.

But so contradictory. It's like when it rains I will be like OMG I LOVE RAIN. Then after that I will be like oh shit I cant go swimming today then.

Hahahaha. Hard to choose between my 2 loves.



Sidenote; my birthday is over and I am officially 24. But actually I have already considered myself 24 since the start of 2015. It's easier.

I used to take birthdays very seriously. Not with birthday celebrations or cakes. I'm not a fan of cake. And my family never had the tradition of celebrating birthdays so not birthday celebrations either. Just birthday wishes. Like I used to be quite obsessed with how many people wished me happy birthday because the more the number, the more 'important' and loved I am.

But seems like I kinda matured abit. Of course it still matters to me. But not the quantity. Now I have understood that the quality of friends is so much more important.

This year I have removed my birthday from Facebook. And the difference is huge. But it is heartwarming(:

I've had the really important people wish me happy birthday.
Ruth was first, followed by Tony whom I was on the phone with. Then the rest of the Ahh5 group (Jol, Sarah and then Qiu).
Then in the morning when I woke up, Deanna wished me.
And then after that my father and sister.
At night when my mum came home, my mum wished me.
And close to midnight, Aiming wished me
The next day Pam wished me and said sorry it was late
[Update: on 5th December Yuhan msged me and wished me happy birthday and said sorry for the late wish 'cuz he was in reservist. Really shocked and thankful for it because as mentioned I removed my birthday from my FB. AND I haven't spoken to him in eons. REALLLLLLLY long. But he remembered. So am really thankful for it!!]

If this were back when I was in Seconday School, I would have been depressed. That said, in secondary school I probaby received even less. Definitely WAAAAYYYYYY less. Wasn't popular and my birthday was during the holidays. Who would bother to remember?!
But seriously speaking..I don't remember others' birthdays as well. It's really humbling to know that people REMEMBER your birthday without notification from facebook. (: Its humbling and heartwaming. And it is ENOUGH. I don't need lots of people to wish me.
I just need the important ones to. (FYI stupid zg didn't wish me and seriously not surprised. We are all damn bad with birthdays)



Next year I am already 25. Quarterlife. So I have decided I want to make next year count. I have already signed up for Sundown 2016 FULL MARATHON.
Never completed a marathon in my life and next year, the QUARTERLIFE CRISIS YEAR, will be it. I'm really excited!!



I have decided to write out my bucket list and I have to tick off afew every year. I don't want to continue living like this. A full marathon is on my bucket list. Though my final aim is not Sundown but Standard Chartered. But nonetheless first marathon at 25 sounds not bad.

I don't know what next year will bring. But I do know that next year I WILL COMPLETE MY FIRST MARATHON. Not like last year which I got prematurely stopped 'cuz the roads were re-opening and we hadta stop 'cuz we were a little slow. But nonetheless we still had about 1.5hrs to complete the remaining 8km which is DOABLE.
But they stopped us 'cuz the roads hadta be open. So nevermind.
Next year shall be my first.



This year has been fun in terms of events I joined. I joined a swim event for the first time in my life and really enjoyed it(: Have always wanted to join one.
And the medal was great and I was proud of myself.

Even though there was rushing from one Safra to another, even though we completed a swim at midnight on Sat and had a 7am swim on Sun, I still enjoyed myself immensely. We just kinda clicked and it's really nice to have someone I don't feel awkward with. I am socially awkward fyi.

And I managed to swim a total of 300laps (Though their 1lap is actually half a lap), which adds up to 15km!! I swam 15km in 3 days and that is something to be really proud of!
I had a great time and for the first time in a long time I had a buddy to join with. Choped her for next year swim event.

But I don't just wanna do running event. I don't just wanna do swimming event. I want to do a combination. I want to do duathlons (or aqualthon. Either way I am referring to the Run and Swim one).

And when I have my own bicycle and have completed and confident of duathlons/aqualthons, I want to do my ultimate bucket list: the Triathlon.



Feels like as if its the end of the year like that, reflections on the year. But I think one of the happier/fresher moments of this year is DEFINITELY Swim-for-Hope. I loved it and I will definitely join it again!!



It hasn't been a great year. Full of emotions. Am I stronger? Nope. Haha. Sadly. But nonetheless, it's good to think of things I wanna do next year.

SO MANY THINGS I WANT TO DO IN THIS LIFETIME AND NOT ENOUGH MONEY AND TIME AND LIFE TO DO IT!!