something random but randomly sweet(:

my mummy slping wif me this week so she was getting 0utta bed 2 get something and i looked cuz she was standing up and making noise (i using lappy)

den i saw her wearing socks. like sec sch length kinda socks (i mean the length dat the school sells, nt de length we wear) and i was like huuh why u wearing socks 2 slp sia?

and she told me oh cuz my dad bought it 4 her and she's been wearing it since, and its 4 slping one.

sweet uhh? more often den nt my dad is throwing tantrums and being mad at my poor mum bt they do haf random sweet moments i guess!(:

and my dad can get very happy over pieces of meat. namely, LAMB. he bought mutton de other day 2 cook and was happy the WHOLE day even tho my sis and i gt bigger portions than him

cuz i always tell myself DONT EXPECT MUCH. but i still end up wishing and expecting and hoping, and getting hurt, disappointed and demoralised.

seriously? i should start getting prepared 2 be single 4 life.

tell me when will i ever haf someone who would put me first.

been sad abt afew stuffs recently but on the other hand i've been really blessed too!

i metup alot wif my bestie recently, 4 random latenite suppers. quite afew days never meet alr tho. alr kinda missing the latenite suppers at mac. whr she'll order HAPPYMEAL-.- the last time was like thursday=(

bt im really glad cuz this is 1 frenship which i never wanted 2 let go of(: and it warms my heart 2 noe dat she really treasures this frenship too!(: dats really all dat i need(:

another blessing is yuhan! hahas. weird, i kno. especially since i used 2 like him. bt we're frenz and he's really kinda crazy. in the nice way of cuz.

talked 2 him abt smt and his reply was "no worries lah.. u will find more frd

and better ones

and one of em will be ur bf!

and

husband!"

HAHA yea. de same guy who ask me go supermarket and look at guys buying groceries 4 potential bf!!

and after he said dat 2 me (the find more frenz), i was like awwww. den i said nvm i gt other frenz. like him! and i told him i'll text him again at like 3 plus am and he was like ok! crazy guy. seriously. HAHAHAHA!! really ren tai hao le la!

ok! randoms end.

u'll never know how much it hurt, because u never really cared.

insecurities over the same thing over and over and over again. sometimes i really wish that for once people would notice me first. because it hurts. it's like a knife through the self confidence everytime something like that happens. and this happens all the time. i should have been immune to it but for some weird reason it hurts all the time. though i should have been totally mentally prepared from the start. but still. some things im unable to prepare myself for. and some things cannot be numbed towards. maybe i should just wake up, from the dream that i had since young. the dream of a happily ever after. cuz c'mon, face facts mel.

been seriously quite long since i seriously blogged.

went 0ut wif my crazy bestie on sat!! totally<3 hahas

been meeting her randomly actually! like once when we bumped into each other. kinda. she was on the bus and i was at the inter. and we were on the phone!! talking abt NZ of cuz(: next june!! totally cant wait!!

met her 4 supper on thurs? and den fri she and tony biked over wif delivery of tauhuey and youtiao 4 me!<3 hahas!! and den sat we metup!! awesome thing was thr was cute guy *winks*

HAHAHAHAHA!! de guy pam and i are 4ever "fighting" over cuz he's SERIOUSLY CUTE!! OHOHO!! bt anyway. they lied 2 me say he nt coming den say another fren of tony's is coming. in de end its him. i jitao ??? when i saw him! hahas

and they tried 2 matchmake us-.- pamela matchmake me wif de 2nd person alr cans. 1st was her colleague-.- 2nd is de cuteguy-.-

lucky nt dat awkward sia. had an awesome time of eating, tauhuey/grass jelly+youtiao-ing (again, fattening) and den finding a decent pub 2 drink at. in de end our final destination? a thai pub at golden mile complex. if u think ew immediately, totally wrong. the pub is really nice!! alot of thai songs bt gt eng and chi songs sia. nicee. and the people are totally cute and friendly!! gt 1 table once their people sing song they'll ALL stand up and start dancing. CUTENESS MAX!! even when gt 2 were playing pool they oso dance along. HAHAHAHA!!

very nice atmosphere!! probs will go again? hahas. bt muz find 1 day meetup again!! so thankful 4 these frenships cuz we seldom meet bt when we meetup thr's like TOTALLY NO AWKWARDNESS!!<3 and we still suan each other. i hadta beg tony 2 send me 2 bedok de next day and i kept saying he v handsome, very charming blah blah. buay zidong one leh he. on the way rite-.- HAHAHAHA!!

reached home at 445 liddat and hadta wake up at 730 de next day cuz going marina barage but AMAZINGLY i was awake through0ut the day!! even running ard and playing games!!

enjoyed my sat and sunday max(:

oni; i wonder. can i still haf so much fun wif them im if not doing well and they judge me? can i juz stay 4 de fun? please? hahas. yea. thinkaloud.